It's that time of year again. The time of year we're all scrambling to get the best gifts at the best prices, and indulging in the usual holiday delicacies. Call me the Ghost of Christmas Conscience, but I simply must take this opportunity to blog my brains out on the tender subjects of both educated shopping and eating.
What We See
Brightly decorated store windows, displaying the latest merchandise, accompanied by big tantalizing SALE! signs. Hard to resist.
What We Get
(In most cases:) The products of unethical sweatshop labor. Read the tags on an item of clothing: MADE IN VIETNAM or CHINA or INDONESIA etc. The companies that stock most department stores export their labor to developing nations. Factories in those countries don't have to abide by the comparatively strict standards as factories in the United States. Conditions are appalling, wages are inadequate (to say the least), and many allow child
labor.
What To Do
The most powerful tool at any customer's disposal is the boycott. Don't buy from companies who exploit their workers. Often this is difficult considering the lack of accessible alternatives, but if we let obstacles like this stop us nothing will ever change.
Look for items that are specifically labeled "sweatshop free" or "fair trade." Support good industry with your money. Even if you can't always afford to buy ethically made, buy used. Make sure that the money paid for used items is not returning to the manufacturer.
What We See
Brightly decorated store windows, displaying the latest merchandise, accompanied by big tantalizing SALE! signs. Hard to resist.
What We Get
(In most cases:) The products of unethical sweatshop labor. Read the tags on an item of clothing: MADE IN VIETNAM or CHINA or INDONESIA etc. The companies that stock most department stores export their labor to developing nations. Factories in those countries don't have to abide by the comparatively strict standards as factories in the United States. Conditions are appalling, wages are inadequate (to say the least), and many allow child
What To Do
The most powerful tool at any customer's disposal is the boycott. Don't buy from companies who exploit their workers. Often this is difficult considering the lack of accessible alternatives, but if we let obstacles like this stop us nothing will ever change.
What We See
A delicious holiday feast, slow-roasted cut of meat at the center, surrounded by cheesy side dishes, followed by a rich chocolate dessert. Wish we could eat like this year round.
What We Get
The products of a factory farm or Concentrated Animal Feeding Operation (CAFO). These are places where food animals are kept ankle deep in their own waste, and fattened on evolutionarily inappropriate diets. Take for example the cow, whose feed consists almost entirely of corn. Cows are not designed to eat corn, which is why the CAFOs must process the animals in as little time as possible, before they die of malnutrition. The rest of their
Oh, and did I mention that these operations are exempt from clean air and pollution policies?! They have virtually no restrictions to prevent them from dumping their toxic wastes right into the Gulf of Mexico. The animals, and the environment they live in, are both so full of chemicals that the manure they produce (which could be used as a valuable, free fertilizer for farming!) becomes a bio-hazard!
What To Do
I'm not going to proselytize veganism. I'm stating facts, not vilifying omnivores. After all, humans are omnivores. But this is wrong. There's a difference between sustainable farming - humans and animals in harmony - and factory farming - humans treating animals as brute commodities.
I will, however, implore you: do not support CAFOs with your money.
Find a nonindustrial farm, or CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) near you. Buy your food animals and animal byproducts from a farmer who treats her or his livestock with respect. Unfortunately, the meat and eggs and milk and cheese in the supermarket do not come from sustainable farms, even if the label says "free range."
It honestly makes me sad when people won't research where their food and clothing come from. Ignorance is not bliss, and in the long run - we all suffer due to the lies behind our unexamined lives. Consumers ultimately rule when it comes to industry. Every dollar spent is a vote for what is was spent on. Don't let your power go to waste!
peace.
Plymouth Massachusetts was not the first place the Pilgrims landed in their pursuit of religious freedom. They stopped first in the Netherlands, but didn't stay long, afraid of losing their own cultural identities.
These people were part of a culture that didn't attach much value to women in general. Their worth depended solely on the approval of men.
They had to fit themselves into narrow, socially acceptable, roles.
The first few years in North America were brutal. Mortality rates were high. The pilgrim women had to be strong to survive, even if strength was not a part of the "traditional" feminine demeanor. Their hard work kept everyone alive.
Unfortunately, once the colonies were established and everyone felt safe again, it was time for the women to return to their menial tasks. But what if they refused to? It's a paradigm that's been repeated throughout history, most notably after WWII - when women were needed on the workforce while men were scarce, but were forced to relinquish their jobs and go back to housekeeping when their husbands returned from war.
In Puritan times, there was virtually no separation of church and state. "Sinning" and breaking the law were interchangeable. Therefore, any woman who dared remain independent, in defiance of Christian patriarchy, was punished. A woman couldn't own or inherit her own property, and if she refused to marry she also was subject to suspicion. Midwives who dared defy the customs of (male) Christian physicians with their own herbal remedies (and common sense) were even easier targets. Especially the ones who taught the heretical practice of contraception, carried out safe abortions, or performed C-sections. Better a woman die in childbirth than violate the Lord's will in matters of reproduction.
The simplest way to get rid of these women, when they challenged the status quo: accuse them of witchcraft. No one in their right mind would defend a "witch", lest they be accused themselves. The Puritans in power exploited the ignorance and fear of ordinary to people, in order to subdue women who questioned their place in the world. Women who wanted control of their own assets. Women who wanted control of their own bodies. Women who wanted to be recognized as full humans in the eyes of the law.
The Salem Witch Trials did many things, besides killing innocent people
(women and men). It's not often seen as yet another systematic censorship of early feminists.
peace.
These people were part of a culture that didn't attach much value to women in general. Their worth depended solely on the approval of men.
They had to fit themselves into narrow, socially acceptable, roles.
The first few years in North America were brutal. Mortality rates were high. The pilgrim women had to be strong to survive, even if strength was not a part of the "traditional" feminine demeanor. Their hard work kept everyone alive.
Unfortunately, once the colonies were established and everyone felt safe again, it was time for the women to return to their menial tasks. But what if they refused to? It's a paradigm that's been repeated throughout history, most notably after WWII - when women were needed on the workforce while men were scarce, but were forced to relinquish their jobs and go back to housekeeping when their husbands returned from war.
The simplest way to get rid of these women, when they challenged the status quo: accuse them of witchcraft. No one in their right mind would defend a "witch", lest they be accused themselves. The Puritans in power exploited the ignorance and fear of ordinary to people, in order to subdue women who questioned their place in the world. Women who wanted control of their own assets. Women who wanted control of their own bodies. Women who wanted to be recognized as full humans in the eyes of the law.
The Salem Witch Trials did many things, besides killing innocent people
(women and men). It's not often seen as yet another systematic censorship of early feminists.
peace.
Yes, I am home-schooled. If you are, or were, home-schooled too - you will find
this list both hysterically funny and caustically accurate. If you are not, or never were, home-schooled - read it anyway. Think of it as a "learning experience", which we home-schoolers are quite fond of.
While I'm at it, let me add that the underlying tone of this list also applies beautifully to us vegans.
peace.
Warning: The following post is rated PG-13, and it's pretty flaming angry.
OK people, I know this is an extremely controversial subject. But that's the reason I'm writing about it now. It's controversial because people don't like to talk about it. We suppress it and try to hide it, or we sugar-coat it and resort to euphemisms. Or, worst of all, we try to validate it and prove that it's "evolutionary", it's just a fact of life which we have to accept.
It's wrong. It thrives in fear and humiliation. Hiding it only strengthens the damage it can do, and if everyone were open and refused to tolerate it, like so many other acts of hate or injustice, it would defeated.
It infuriates me. I'm referring to sexual violence.
Sexual violence is predominately a feminist issue because it affects mainly women. Yes, I know that it is possible for a man to be assaulted by a woman (or another man, which is actually more common), and in recent years the number of harassed men is on the rise. But, statistics show that women make up 78% of victims, and 1 in 4 women in the US has been sexually assaulted at one point in her life. Some see the rise in male victims as an "evening of the field" (therefore a good thing), but this is not helping to solve the problem in any way. Don't you think the number of female victims should be going down instead?
Sexual harassment (weather it's in schools, workplaces, or randomly on the streets) is usually merely "ignored" i.e. tolerated. Most women are afraid to confront the harasser directly, or to report the harassment to someone. Anyone. It's practically taken for granted these days. This is wrong.
Sexual abuse (usually occurring in schools, workplaces, or homes) is rarely reported. The scary statistics say: the most likely place for a woman to be sexually assaulted is in her own home, by someone she knows.
Sexual assault or rape is a violent crime. And it's possibly the least reported crime there is. Only 1 in 5 women ever report being assaulted to the police. The way I see it, sex is too often associated with dominance and violence. Rape, as a crime, has become way too socially acceptable. It should be a crime as unthinkable as cannibalism.
Prevention is more effective than treatment. Even if the attack is reported, and the perpetrator is caught and punished, it still happened. The victim will have to live with it everyday for the rest of her life. Too often she's the subject of remarks like "You should have been more careful..." or even "You were asking for it." Do not blame the victim! No one ever asks to be raped! The guy should never have attacked her in the first place! All over the country - in dojos, health clubs and church basements - we offer self-defense classes where women and girls can learn to fight for their lives. How about some classes to teach men and boys respect for other Human Beings?!
I would never exprobate self defense measures, but I can't help but point out that they are not adressing or solving the true problem of socially acceptable violence.
In closing, I highly recommend the book Speak, by Laurie Halse Anderson, and the movie based on it (which was excellently done). I also recommend openness, respect and zero tolerance toward violence - the only things that can truly solve this problem.
peace.
It's wrong. It thrives in fear and humiliation. Hiding it only strengthens the damage it can do, and if everyone were open and refused to tolerate it, like so many other acts of hate or injustice, it would defeated.
It infuriates me. I'm referring to sexual violence.
Sexual violence is predominately a feminist issue because it affects mainly women. Yes, I know that it is possible for a man to be assaulted by a woman (or another man, which is actually more common), and in recent years the number of harassed men is on the rise. But, statistics show that women make up 78% of victims, and 1 in 4 women in the US has been sexually assaulted at one point in her life. Some see the rise in male victims as an "evening of the field" (therefore a good thing), but this is not helping to solve the problem in any way. Don't you think the number of female victims should be going down instead?
Sexual abuse (usually occurring in schools, workplaces, or homes) is rarely reported. The scary statistics say: the most likely place for a woman to be sexually assaulted is in her own home, by someone she knows.
Sexual assault or rape is a violent crime. And it's possibly the least reported crime there is. Only 1 in 5 women ever report being assaulted to the police. The way I see it, sex is too often associated with dominance and violence. Rape, as a crime, has become way too socially acceptable. It should be a crime as unthinkable as cannibalism.
Prevention is more effective than treatment. Even if the attack is reported, and the perpetrator is caught and punished, it still happened. The victim will have to live with it everyday for the rest of her life. Too often she's the subject of remarks like "You should have been more careful..." or even "You were asking for it." Do not blame the victim! No one ever asks to be raped! The guy should never have attacked her in the first place! All over the country - in dojos, health clubs and church basements - we offer self-defense classes where women and girls can learn to fight for their lives. How about some classes to teach men and boys respect for other Human Beings?!
I would never exprobate self defense measures, but I can't help but point out that they are not adressing or solving the true problem of socially acceptable violence.
In closing, I highly recommend the book Speak, by Laurie Halse Anderson, and the movie based on it (which was excellently done). I also recommend openness, respect and zero tolerance toward violence - the only things that can truly solve this problem.
peace.
Step It Up 2007 is national action organization calling for some good political leadership on global warming. Their goal: to cut carbon emissions by 80% by the year 2050
(it would be nice if that could happen sooner,
of course...).
This Saturday, Nov. 3, they'll be having rallies all over the country for their Step It Up 2: Who's a Leader? campaign. Unfortunately, I won't be able to attend any of the rallies, but you can visit stepitup2007.org to find one in your area!
peace.
(it would be nice if that could happen sooner,
of course...).
This Saturday, Nov. 3, they'll be having rallies all over the country for their Step It Up 2: Who's a Leader? campaign. Unfortunately, I won't be able to attend any of the rallies, but you can visit stepitup2007.org to find one in your area!
peace.
Halloween is my favorite holiday, no question. I'll take any excuse to cook up a feast, wear a costume, and carve whatever comes to mind onto a pumpkin.
Everybody knows Halloween has some ancient roots, right? We can easily trace it back to All Hallows Eve; but this oft-cited holiday was actually just a Papal mandate to keep those pagan Celts from celebrating their own festival of Samhain. (Pronounced: sow-en)
When the Romans invaded Britain and started converting the Celts to Christianity, one of their most effective tactics was to place Christian holidays on the same days as the already existing pagan celebrations. It's no coincidence that Christmas is the same time of year as Yule, or that Easter matches up with Ostara. They let the pagans keep their feast days, but tacked biblical stories onto their traditions. This inexact distribution of fables and holidays helps to explain why the historical accuracy of the nativity story is questioned - it's seasonally irrational. (The shepherds would not be watching over their flocks by night unless it was lambing season, in the spring. They wouldn't be out there in late December.)
Everybody knows Halloween has some ancient roots, right? We can easily trace it back to All Hallows Eve; but this oft-cited holiday was actually just a Papal mandate to keep those pagan Celts from celebrating their own festival of Samhain. (Pronounced: sow-en)
When the Romans invaded Britain and started converting the Celts to Christianity, one of their most effective tactics was to place Christian holidays on the same days as the already existing pagan celebrations. It's no coincidence that Christmas is the same time of year as Yule, or that Easter matches up with Ostara. They let the pagans keep their feast days, but tacked biblical stories onto their traditions. This inexact distribution of fables and holidays helps to explain why the historical accuracy of the nativity story is questioned - it's seasonally irrational. (The shepherds would not be watching over their flocks by night unless it was lambing season, in the spring. They wouldn't be out there in late December.)
So, the original holiday is Samhain. It's usually considered to be the most important of the four greater Sabbats on the Wheel of the Year by Wiccans and Pagans. It's a celebration of the harvest and remembrance of the dead. It's also believed that the veil between the worlds is thinest on this day, the best time to communicate with those who've passed on. According to the pagan legends, this is the time when the God dies and departs to the underworld, leaving the pregnant Goddess on earth.
Secular, commercialized Halloween may be about ghosts and spiders and creepy dead stuff (all in the spirit of fun, of course), but it started out as a very positive celebration of the natural phenomenon of death. And it's never had anything to do with devil worship or dark magic, thank you very much.
peace.
Secular, commercialized Halloween may be about ghosts and spiders and creepy dead stuff (all in the spirit of fun, of course), but it started out as a very positive celebration of the natural phenomenon of death. And it's never had anything to do with devil worship or dark magic, thank you very much.
peace.
This is where my mini series comes to a close, because honestly, there's not much left to say. The previous segments covered all the most demanding factors of Eating with People Who Don't Eat Exactly What You Eat. Now I'll simply address two slightly less hazardous positions to be in: the omnivore guest, and the herbivore host.
Please excuse my obsessive need for closure, I promise I'll get back to posting more interesting topics after this!
Part 3 - The Omnivore Guest
How to Eat with a Party of Mainly Herbivores
(These tips are all numbered 1, because they are all equally important.)
1. If you know that the company you will be in is predominantly vegetarian/vegan/fruitarian/raw-foodist, brace yourself for some unusual cuisine. This is not the time to be picky, be open to trying new things. (If you don't know the dietary preferences of the people you'll be eating with until you actually arrive, then you'll have to adopt this attitude rather quickly.)
1. Don't enter the situation with a chip on your shoulder, just because you're the only one in the room who eats animal products.
1. Be aware that the herbivores may occasionally drop derogatory remarks about the things you eat, weather they're aware of your diet or not. Just keep in mind that they shouldn't be criticizing you specifically, and constantly jumping to the defense of an omnivorous diet will not make you very popular. If possible, let them know that you do eat animal products and if they're polite they'll avoid denouncing meat in your presence.
1. In return, don't denounce their diet either. It may be hard to take the anti-meat mood (if there is one), but don't get hyper-defensive. Note: This is part of being a minority. You may not be used to it (but your hosts probably are). You have to remain calm and respectful no matter what.
1. Don't bring meat to a vegetarian/vegan pot luck. No one will laugh, trust me.
Part 4 - The Herbivore Host
How to Accommodate Omnivores
1. If you invite someone who eats animal products to eat with you, let them know beforehand that the food will be all vegetarian/vegan/fruitarian/raw. (And make sure they don't have a soy allergy!)
1. If you're inviting other herbivores, let them know that they'll be in "mixed company" so they won't be unintentionally rude to the omnivore(s).
1. Try to offer plenty of familiar, traditionally animal-free dishes, in case your guest is resistant to trying new foods.
1. At the table, keep the conversation away from food and/or food politics.
1. Don't criticize or tease your guest for their diet, it will make them severely uncomfortable, especially if they're outnumbered.
Well, that's all folks. If I left anything out, please let me know so I can add it to the lists. And if you ever need help with this sort of thing, just check the lists again, that's what they're for!
peace.
Please excuse my obsessive need for closure, I promise I'll get back to posting more interesting topics after this!
Part 3 - The Omnivore Guest
How to Eat with a Party of Mainly Herbivores
(These tips are all numbered 1, because they are all equally important.)
1. If you know that the company you will be in is predominantly vegetarian/vegan/fruitarian/raw-foodist, brace yourself for some unusual cuisine. This is not the time to be picky, be open to trying new things. (If you don't know the dietary preferences of the people you'll be eating with until you actually arrive, then you'll have to adopt this attitude rather quickly.)
1. Don't enter the situation with a chip on your shoulder, just because you're the only one in the room who eats animal products.
1. Be aware that the herbivores may occasionally drop derogatory remarks about the things you eat, weather they're aware of your diet or not. Just keep in mind that they shouldn't be criticizing you specifically, and constantly jumping to the defense of an omnivorous diet will not make you very popular. If possible, let them know that you do eat animal products and if they're polite they'll avoid denouncing meat in your presence.
1. In return, don't denounce their diet either. It may be hard to take the anti-meat mood (if there is one), but don't get hyper-defensive. Note: This is part of being a minority. You may not be used to it (but your hosts probably are). You have to remain calm and respectful no matter what.
1. Don't bring meat to a vegetarian/vegan pot luck. No one will laugh, trust me.
Part 4 - The Herbivore Host
How to Accommodate Omnivores
1. If you invite someone who eats animal products to eat with you, let them know beforehand that the food will be all vegetarian/vegan/fruitarian/raw. (And make sure they don't have a soy allergy!)
1. If you're inviting other herbivores, let them know that they'll be in "mixed company" so they won't be unintentionally rude to the omnivore(s).
1. Try to offer plenty of familiar, traditionally animal-free dishes, in case your guest is resistant to trying new foods.
1. At the table, keep the conversation away from food and/or food politics.
1. Don't criticize or tease your guest for their diet, it will make them severely uncomfortable, especially if they're outnumbered.
Well, that's all folks. If I left anything out, please let me know so I can add it to the lists. And if you ever need help with this sort of thing, just check the lists again, that's what they're for!
peace.
Ok people, time for round two. Can't you just feel the patience, the tolerance, the open-mindedness... who wants a hug? Anyone?
All right, herbivores, chances are you're more than used to dietary contestation. But that's no reason to forget common courtesy in the face of the occasional dogmatic steakaholic when they snort at your tofu. I know you have strong reasons for eating what you eat, but unfortunately not everyone appreciates them. You may be taken as a threat, so you have to take precautions to avoid offending anyone (too bad precautions are not always taken in return - for more info, see my previous post).
Once again, here you'll find no blaming or ridicule. Just a guide to keep everyone happy and, hopefully, well fed. As a vegan, it's hard not to be un-biased, but believe me, I'm trying. If any omnivores have things to add from the other side of the table, just let me know.
Part 2 - The Herbivore Guest
How to Eat with Omnivores (When You're Invited)
(These tips are all numbered 1, because they are all equally important.)
Preparation
1. When you are invited to eat with someone (or to an event where food will be served), find a way to inform the host of your dietary restrictions. Be extremely clear about what you do and do not eat.
1. If possible, offer to bring food of your own, or something to share.
1. If you will be eating at a restaurant, check the place out before hand and get a menu.
1. If you doubt there will be little or nothing for you to eat at the event, eat before hand so you at least won't be hungry.
At the Table
1. When people offer you something you don't eat, refuse it politely. When they ask why you're not eating it say simply "I'm a vegetarian/vegan." When they ask you why you're a vegetarian/vegan, tell them you'd prefer not to discuss it, as the subject tends to make people uncomfortable. Avoid discussing your reasons at the table at all costs (within the bounds of courtesy, of course - no screaming, or running out of the room, that would be (more) awkward).
1. Although it's tempting, avoid using phrasing like "I can't eat that", this undermines the core values of your diet, because the whole point is your conscious choice not to eat animal products. The word to use is "I don't eat that".
1. Sometimes it's easier to let people believe you're avoiding certain foods due to allergies. At least, people are almost always more sympathetic. But you're going to have to explain it to them eventually, so try to keep things less confusing by being very clear (and polite).
1. If someone persists in discussing your diet, despite your attempts to change the subject, you may have to answer some awkward questions. Whatever you do, do not react to rudeness. Even if they blatantly denounce the rights of animals or forecast your painful death by malnutrition, I repeat: do not react. Any heated disagreement will get you labeled as an offensive, self righteous salad-muncher, even if you were only defending yourself. So, always remain calm and respectful.
1. While we're on the subject, do not criticize what someone else is eating. Ever. This is rude.
1. Do not drop remarks like "meat is murder", or make faces at other people's food.
1. Do not act high and mighty.
1. Do not complain about how hard it is to be a vegetarian/vegan. This is your choice, remember?
1. Do not expect people to bend over backwards for you, get used to making due with what you can.
After Wards
1. Always remember to thank your hosts when they are considerate enough to provide animal-free food for you. I mean it, accommodating weird diets (be they allergen or principle related) is hard. Let people know you appreciate them for trying.
Coming up next: The omnivore guest.
peace.
All right, herbivores, chances are you're more than used to dietary contestation. But that's no reason to forget common courtesy in the face of the occasional dogmatic steakaholic when they snort at your tofu. I know you have strong reasons for eating what you eat, but unfortunately not everyone appreciates them. You may be taken as a threat, so you have to take precautions to avoid offending anyone (too bad precautions are not always taken in return - for more info, see my previous post).
Once again, here you'll find no blaming or ridicule. Just a guide to keep everyone happy and, hopefully, well fed. As a vegan, it's hard not to be un-biased, but believe me, I'm trying. If any omnivores have things to add from the other side of the table, just let me know.
Part 2 - The Herbivore Guest
How to Eat with Omnivores (When You're Invited)
(These tips are all numbered 1, because they are all equally important.)
Preparation
1. When you are invited to eat with someone (or to an event where food will be served), find a way to inform the host of your dietary restrictions. Be extremely clear about what you do and do not eat.
1. If possible, offer to bring food of your own, or something to share.
1. If you will be eating at a restaurant, check the place out before hand and get a menu.
1. If you doubt there will be little or nothing for you to eat at the event, eat before hand so you at least won't be hungry.
At the Table
1. When people offer you something you don't eat, refuse it politely. When they ask why you're not eating it say simply "I'm a vegetarian/vegan." When they ask you why you're a vegetarian/vegan, tell them you'd prefer not to discuss it, as the subject tends to make people uncomfortable. Avoid discussing your reasons at the table at all costs (within the bounds of courtesy, of course - no screaming, or running out of the room, that would be (more) awkward).
1. Although it's tempting, avoid using phrasing like "I can't eat that", this undermines the core values of your diet, because the whole point is your conscious choice not to eat animal products. The word to use is "I don't eat that".
1. Sometimes it's easier to let people believe you're avoiding certain foods due to allergies. At least, people are almost always more sympathetic. But you're going to have to explain it to them eventually, so try to keep things less confusing by being very clear (and polite).
1. If someone persists in discussing your diet, despite your attempts to change the subject, you may have to answer some awkward questions. Whatever you do, do not react to rudeness. Even if they blatantly denounce the rights of animals or forecast your painful death by malnutrition, I repeat: do not react. Any heated disagreement will get you labeled as an offensive, self righteous salad-muncher, even if you were only defending yourself. So, always remain calm and respectful.
1. While we're on the subject, do not criticize what someone else is eating. Ever. This is rude.
1. Do not drop remarks like "meat is murder", or make faces at other people's food.
1. Do not act high and mighty.
1. Do not complain about how hard it is to be a vegetarian/vegan. This is your choice, remember?
1. Do not expect people to bend over backwards for you, get used to making due with what you can.
After Wards
1. Always remember to thank your hosts when they are considerate enough to provide animal-free food for you. I mean it, accommodating weird diets (be they allergen or principle related) is hard. Let people know you appreciate them for trying.
Coming up next: The omnivore guest.
peace.
Humans are not a very complex species. We may take ourselves way too seriously and fight wars over insoluble subjects like religion, but when it comes down to it, we all have the same basic needs. Like food.
We can't convert sunlight into glucose and oxygen, we don't suck the nutrients out of decomposing organic matter (that would be gross), we eat.
Everybody gets to choose what they ingest based on likes and dislikes, food allergies, religious doctrines and/or personal moral convictions. Unfortunately, certain dietary practices often make those who don't adhere to them feel uncomfortable. For that reason I've decided to devote a series of posts to the subject of (drum roll, please): Eating With People Who Don't Eat Exactly What You Eat. What usually makes things so hard is not knowing how to accomodate guests with unusual diets. The most important thing to remember is - they are not challenging, questioning or criticizing you for what you eat. They are making a personal decision about what they eat. Don't feel threatened. You've done nothing wrong.
These posts are in no particular order, and I'm not singling anybody out. They're just meant as a guide to help everybody get along. No blaming, no lecturing. It's hard to be completely un-biased (as I am a vegan), but I'll do my best. Can anybody explain to me why food is such a touchy subject?
Part 1 - The Omnivore Host
How to Eat With Vegetarians and Vegans
(These tips are all numbered 1, because they are all equally important.)
Preparation
1. Before inviting anyone to eat with you, ask if they have any dietary restrictions, including allergies.
1. If they are a vegetarian/vegan, find out exactly what they do and do not eat, because this usually varies from person to person.
(Ova-lacto) Vegetarians do not eat meat (including fish), or things that contain gelatin.
Lacto-vegetarians still eat dairy, but do not eat eggs.
Vegans do not eat meat, eggs, dairy, things that contain gelatin and sometimes honey.
Fruitarians only eat fruits that can be harvested without killing the plant such as tomatos, avacados, nuts and sometimes grains.
Raw Foodists do not eat any processed or cooked food (food that has been heated over 116 degrees F).
1. If the meal's main dish will be meat, be sure to provide side dishes your guest can eat and tell them clearly what they are. I can't tell you how great it feels when a host is considerate enough to do this! (Note: If it is not possible to provide vegan/vegetarian food, tell your guest beforehand, maybe they can bring something of their own.)
1. Be very careful when checking the ingredients of prepared foods, animal ingredients are not always obvious. For this reason, it's usually best to keep things simple and stick with, well, vegetables.
1. Never try to slip animal ingredients into food without telling your guest. This is extremely rude and immature, and they will never trust you again.
At the Table
1. Do not (ever) discuss why your guest doesn't eat what you do at the table. I know it's hard to resist, but please wait until afterwards, when no one is eating. Talking about it over food really makes people uncomfortable, including the guest who has to explain.
1. Do not try to argue with your guest, or discredit the values of an animal-free diet. They've already made their choice, they aren't (or shouldn't be) trying to force it on you.
1. Do not lecture your guest on nutrition, or tell them how it's impossible to get enough protein without meat, or enough calcium without milk, or how they're eating to many carbs or whatever. Chances are, they've already done the research, and you're getting on their nerves. However, if you are truly interested in how they get all their vitamins, ask them later, politely.
1. Do not be (intentionally) rude and insult what your guest eats. "Ew, how can you eat that?" or "It looks like %$@&!" etc. They may be just as grossed out by what you eat, but if they're considerate (not everyone is) they won't mention it.
1. Do not be overly apologetic. I can say from experience, this is very embarrassing and often worse than being downright rude. Don't apologize for eating meat in their presence, or feel guilty about enjoying your food. They already know you eat different things, and that's ok, they're just there to spend time with you!
It all comes down to R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Respect people's choices and they should respect your's too. A little planning ahead can make everyone's life a lot easier. My next post will be from the other perspective: how to behave as a courteous vegan/vegetarian guest. Till then!
peace.
We can't convert sunlight into glucose and oxygen, we don't suck the nutrients out of decomposing organic matter (that would be gross), we eat.
Everybody gets to choose what they ingest based on likes and dislikes, food allergies, religious doctrines and/or personal moral convictions. Unfortunately, certain dietary practices often make those who don't adhere to them feel uncomfortable. For that reason I've decided to devote a series of posts to the subject of (drum roll, please): Eating With People Who Don't Eat Exactly What You Eat. What usually makes things so hard is not knowing how to accomodate guests with unusual diets. The most important thing to remember is - they are not challenging, questioning or criticizing you for what you eat. They are making a personal decision about what they eat. Don't feel threatened. You've done nothing wrong.
These posts are in no particular order, and I'm not singling anybody out. They're just meant as a guide to help everybody get along. No blaming, no lecturing. It's hard to be completely un-biased (as I am a vegan), but I'll do my best. Can anybody explain to me why food is such a touchy subject?
Part 1 - The Omnivore Host
How to Eat With Vegetarians and Vegans
(These tips are all numbered 1, because they are all equally important.)
Preparation
1. Before inviting anyone to eat with you, ask if they have any dietary restrictions, including allergies.
1. If they are a vegetarian/vegan, find out exactly what they do and do not eat, because this usually varies from person to person.
(Ova-lacto) Vegetarians do not eat meat (including fish), or things that contain gelatin.
Lacto-vegetarians still eat dairy, but do not eat eggs.
Vegans do not eat meat, eggs, dairy, things that contain gelatin and sometimes honey.
Fruitarians only eat fruits that can be harvested without killing the plant such as tomatos, avacados, nuts and sometimes grains.
Raw Foodists do not eat any processed or cooked food (food that has been heated over 116 degrees F).
1. If the meal's main dish will be meat, be sure to provide side dishes your guest can eat and tell them clearly what they are. I can't tell you how great it feels when a host is considerate enough to do this! (Note: If it is not possible to provide vegan/vegetarian food, tell your guest beforehand, maybe they can bring something of their own.)
1. Be very careful when checking the ingredients of prepared foods, animal ingredients are not always obvious. For this reason, it's usually best to keep things simple and stick with, well, vegetables.
1. Never try to slip animal ingredients into food without telling your guest. This is extremely rude and immature, and they will never trust you again.
At the Table
1. Do not (ever) discuss why your guest doesn't eat what you do at the table. I know it's hard to resist, but please wait until afterwards, when no one is eating. Talking about it over food really makes people uncomfortable, including the guest who has to explain.
1. Do not try to argue with your guest, or discredit the values of an animal-free diet. They've already made their choice, they aren't (or shouldn't be) trying to force it on you.
1. Do not lecture your guest on nutrition, or tell them how it's impossible to get enough protein without meat, or enough calcium without milk, or how they're eating to many carbs or whatever. Chances are, they've already done the research, and you're getting on their nerves. However, if you are truly interested in how they get all their vitamins, ask them later, politely.
1. Do not be (intentionally) rude and insult what your guest eats. "Ew, how can you eat that?" or "It looks like %$@&!" etc. They may be just as grossed out by what you eat, but if they're considerate (not everyone is) they won't mention it.
1. Do not be overly apologetic. I can say from experience, this is very embarrassing and often worse than being downright rude. Don't apologize for eating meat in their presence, or feel guilty about enjoying your food. They already know you eat different things, and that's ok, they're just there to spend time with you!
It all comes down to R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Respect people's choices and they should respect your's too. A little planning ahead can make everyone's life a lot easier. My next post will be from the other perspective: how to behave as a courteous vegan/vegetarian guest. Till then!
peace.
"We hold these truths to be self-evident,
that all men are created equal..."
That's from the Declaration of Independence. I conjure you to unearth a citizen of the US who does not have those last six words memorized - even if s/he doesn't know where they're from. Here's one from article II of the Constitution:
Section 1. The executive power shall be vested in a President of the United States of America. He shall hold his office during the term of four years..."
The Preamble's great: "We the people...". The Declaration starts off: "When in the course of human events..." good, but it finishes with a few words on "...the opinions of mankind...".
Are you getting uncomfortable yet? Am I being too picky/politically correct? Get used to it, because today's post is on something called inclusive language.
Grammar is Sexist
In the English language, there is no such thing as a neutral singular pronoun. It has to be she or he. More often than not, people will chose the masculine pronoun, especially when they're referring to vocations such as firefighters (firemen), doctors, or anything that has to do with a position of authority. The feminine pronoun is associated with passive or "nurturing" positions such as nurses, teachers (not professors), executive assistants (secretaries). If you're describing a hypothetical person, and you use masculine pronouns, no one cares. If you use feminine pronouns, people assume you're certain that the person is a woman and may even remark on it. Why? Is it too hard to alternate the gender of the pronouns we use?
People Think Sexist
There are many ways for people to think and speak non-inclusively, sometimes without even realizing it. Like by referring to the human race collectively as "mankind" or just "man". What is that supposed to imply? That male humans are the only ones worth recognition? Are female humans merely a marginalized sub-category? How is that possible when we make up 50% of the entire species?
How about all the derogatory remarks - applied to both men and women. "You throw like a girl" to the male baseball player, "You're such a *female dog*" to the tough executive who happens to be a woman. Make a list of some of the most popular insults you can think of (profanity included), you'll find that a lot of them are feminine. The worst thing you can call a guy is - a girl. The worst thing you can call a girl is - a girl.
Life's Not a Race
Yes, we've come a long way in regards to the racism of the past, but there are still issues for us to deal with, particularly when it comes to language. Which are correct: Black and White, or African American and Caucasian? No one can agree on the terms we use just to describe the color of people's skin. What if "race" is merely a social construct invented by humans, and genetically speaking there's no detectable difference between us? Sometimes the words used to describe groups of people aren't even accurate. Which is correct: Indians, Native Americans or American Indians? The only reason for this confusion is the fact that over six hundred years ago, some explorer named Christopher Columbus didn't know that the continent of North America existed!
Today the term "politically correct" is used almost exclusively in a pejorative sense. Some say it even infringes on freedom of speech. In her book Reviving Ophelia, Dr. Mary Pipher called the first amendment (of the Constitution) "the last refuge of scoundrels". Now, no one in their right (democratically thinking) mind would oppose freedom of speech, but remember that it can be exercised by people with hateful opinions just as easily as those working for positive change. Political correctness is not about censorship, it's about being aware of how the things you say will be percieved by the people listening to you. If you use non-inclusive language and terms, people will judge you accordingly. The things you say, and the way you say them, reflect on you as a person.
Too many people equate political correctness with whining. Some see it as being hypersensitive, and urge people to "get over it" or just ignore cases of exclusive language. Ignoring something will NOT make it go away. The only way to effect change is to speak out or to vocally complain about the issue. Your silence will only be taken as agreement.
peace.
